LastBestPlace June 2024

lastbestplace@mailman.ejop.com

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post office humor
by LastBestPlace 01 Jul '24

01 Jul '24

A delightful angelic little boy was waiting for his mother outside the ladies room of the gas station. As he stood there, he was approached by a man who asked, "Sonny, can you tell me where the Post Office is?" The little boy replied, "Sure! Just go straight down this street two blocks and turn to your right. It's on the left." The man thanked the boy kindly, complimented him on how bright he was and said, "I'm the new pastor in town. If you and your mommy come to church on Sunday, I'll show you how to get to Heaven." The little boy replied with a chuckle; "You're shitting me, right? You can't even find the Post Office."

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05/05/24 - 05/09/24: Le and Matt Visit (part 2/2)
by LastBestPlace 07 Jun '24

07 Jun '24

Le & Matt's visit continued .... *Day 3 *Another early day for Sandy, as she was was subbing again at school. After the prior day's excitement and driving, we took an easier day of visiting Lake McDonald Lodge. It was not open, but we could wander around and peer in the windows. Looking back across the lake, the Apgar Mountain range is still snow covered. The lake is roughly 3300 feet elevation, so that snow level is around 4000 feet. Next to (or part of) the lodge is the Creekside Reading Room. As prep for opening the lodge, the staff were inside cleaning and allowed us to take a peek inside. When the lodge is open, this is a delightful location on inclement weather days to spend the day relaxing in front of a fire with a book. It is open to the public. I could very much envision Le, another former coworker Tam, and Sandy enjoying a day there doing absolutely nothing but reading! That afternoon, between some light rainfall, we took a hike out to Rocky Point. *Day 4 *Sandy was not working and was able to join us for a hike. We hiked in to Sacred Dancing Cascades on McDonald Creek. When Going-To-The-Sun road was originally built, there were still lengthier overnight guided horseback trips in the park. There is a horse tunnel under the road on both the east and west sides of the park. Very, very few visitors know about these, as there are not very visible from the road. After hiking through the tunnel, heading to Sacred Dancing Cascades. In order to try and add to the wildlife spotting collection, we walked over to Oxbow Lookout, with it's view of Apgar Mtn, but alas no beavers were out swimming that day. No visit is complete without seeing "the old bridge" (Belton Bridge). It is where I am blessed with stunning views when I go on my regular run. Le & Matt were quite silly (and cute!!) Where the Fork did we go next? To a delicious meal at the Three Forks Grille -- named after the South, North, and Middle forks of the Flathead River. The entrees were so good and so filling that we were unable to partake of anything from their very tempting dessert menu. Huckleberry Creme Brulee will require another visit!!! Dinner was the final item on the agenda, as Le & Matt were on the 6am flight the next morning. But the sun was still out, and on a whim we thought we'd see if there was some alpenglow to see from Apgar. We were treated to quite a show! Since it was around sunset, which is when beavers sometimes come out, we headed over to the beaver house on McDonald Creek. No beavers, but 15 minutes of a fantastic sunset in the park finished off our day. The parting silly photo at the end. Simply wow! What a wonderful time was had by all. Le & Matt, thank you so much for your visit. We thoroughly enjoyed it, and look forward to the next time.

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05/05/24 - 05/09/24: Le and Matt Visit (part 1/2)
by LastBestPlace 07 Jun '24

07 Jun '24

Le and Matt were finally able to come for their first visit to Montana in early May. Like all our other guests, we expect this to be the first of many visits! I started working at Adobe Systems in January of 1996. Le joined in 1997, and for the next 21 years we either worked fairly close - many years spent on the same team - or on closely related work that kept us in contact. So it was a great thrill when the opportunity arose that she and her husband would finally be able to visit. I would normally not recommend early May as the time to see the park for the first time, as many areas are closed due to snow and the weather can be cold and very wet. But that opinion was vastly incorrect!!! Read on .... *Day 1: *Le & Matt's flight arrived in to Kalispell around noontime, which means we still had half a day of sightseeing to do. So from the airport we went directly up the North Fork to Polebridge. Huckleberry bearclaws and chocolate poppy seed rolls are the first order of pastry business after a flight. The roads to Kintla and Bowman lakes were still closed with snow, but the southbound Inside North Fork road to Logging Lake was open. This was a treat for me as well as them, in that in all the time I've been to Glacier I had never driven that stretch of road inside the park. It's a gorgeous one lane dirt road through an area of older growth forest that has escaped the many forest fires that have gone by nearby areas. The historic Logging Ranger Station is where the road dead ends, and as we stopped and munched on the pastries, we met a volunteer who is working there -- a delightful conversation ensued as he had been the manager at Sperry Chalet in the early 2000s. After that it was back to the house for dinner. *Day 2 *As host and tour guide for many visitors, we are proud of our long record of making each day of a guest's visit better than the previous one. That streak was to be broken, as Le & Matt were treated to a wildlife spotting day that simply cannot be surpassed. We were up early that day. Sandy was subbing at the school and did not join us. The road in to Many Glacier had just been opened, so the plan was to go to the east side. The forecast on the east side was windy -- heck, it's always windy there, so when it's mentioned in the forecast to be windy that means 50mph gusts are expected. Out the door we do the quick obligatory photo stop in Apgar at Lake McDonald. Still plenty of snow on the mountains. Then the drive over to the east side. First stop is the Silver Staircase waterfall. Then a stop at Marias Pass. Still plenty of snow to play in. As we left the pass, through the trees I caught a glimpse of a mountain goat on the other side of the railroad tracks. By the time I found a place to turn around and get back to show it off, it was gone. So an "almost" mountain goat sighting. As we continued driving towards East Glacier, Matt in the backseat excitedly yelled out "Bear, out on the hill!". Though Le and I missed seeing it, it fully counts as a bear sighting! Lake Sherburne, just inside the park at Many Glacier. The white caps on the lake indicate very windy. The closer we head in, the cloudier the sky turned. While Many Glacier Hotel was not open, we could still wander onto the deck and enjoy the view of Grinnell Point. And yes, we are very tightly bundled up. As we drove away from hotel we stopped in the parking lot to tour the not so historic and not so scenic but still open outhouse. It was while we were in the parking lot that a bald eagle flew by overhead. It was not moving very fast, as it was heading in to the wind. So add bald eagle to the day's wildlife sighting. From Many Glacier, we drove to St. Mary and re-entered the park there. The first stop was Sun Point. It was probably the windiest I've ever experienced there. The views, as always, were stunning. From there as we drove up to Jackson Glacier overlook to where the road closure was, Matt yelled out "Mountain Goats!". There were slightly behind us up on the right side, and as driver I could not see them. Le & Matt shared their photos with me, where I identified them as a group of Bighorn Sheep. Add that to the wildlife sightings! Next stop was at Sunrift Gorge. While there we saw up close and personal on the wall by where the car was parked a very cute looking Hoary Marmot. No tour is complete without a stop to see Wild Goose Island as seen here https://youtu.be/9spGH0YMkj8 We then drove about 100 yards, and as we came around a bend in the road I saw two cars stopped ahead in the road. I immediately said to get the cameras out as there was probably a bear or something ahead. Even better, there was a young moose at the side of the road chomping on bushes. It was very close and we remained safely in the car. After we left St. Mary, about 5 miles before we entered the town of Browning, I saw some animals in the field on the right side of the road running. It took a moment to figure out that it was two dogs chasing a small black bear away. Second bear sighting of the day. So the score for the day was 2 bears, 3 or 4 Bighorn, 1 bald eagle, 1 moose, 1 Hoary marmot, and one Mountain Goat. Not bad for Le & Matt's first full day in the park!

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80th anniversary
by LastBestPlace 06 Jun '24

06 Jun '24

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answered prayer humor
by LastBestPlace 02 Jun '24

02 Jun '24

At the end of the sermon, the pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express a praise for an answered prayer. Suzie stood and walked to the podium. She said, "I have a praise. Two months ago, my husband, Frank, had a terrible bicycle accident and his scrotum was completely crushed. "The pain was excruciating, and the doctors didn't know if they could help him." You could hear a muffled gasp from the men in the congregation as they imagined the pain that poor Frank must have experienced. “Frank was unable to hold me or the children," she went on, "and every move caused him terrible pain." We prayed as the doctors performed a delicate operation, and it turned out they were able to piece together the crushed remnants of Frank's scrotum and wrap fine wire around it to hold it in place with metal staples.” Again, the men in the congregation cringed and squirmed uncomfortably as they imagined the horrible surgery performed on Frank. “Now," she announced in a quivering voice, "thank the Lord, Frank is out of the hospital and the doctors say that with time, his scrotum should recover completely.” All the men sighed with unified relief. The pastor rose and tentatively asked if anyone else had something to say. A man stood up and walked slowly to the podium. He said, "I'm Frank." The entire congregation held its breath. “I just want to tell my wife that the word is sternum.”

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